"Holy shit there's a baby in there?"

When you are pregnant, people tell you that you'll wake up one day and have a belly. Um, yeah...I think I've got it. I was walking around, feeling awesome b/c I'd only gained 3 lbs since the "Day of the Pink Pee Stick" even though my workout routine has gone the way of the dinosaurs. Twas to be a short lived phenomenon as I literally woke up yesterday with this: {Click to enlarge}



A few disclaimers about this photo:

1. Don't judge my hair. When you have 13 lbs. of Italian hair, everyday that you don't look like Carrot top is a tiny victory.
2. Pardon the ugly bathroom...whomever designed this building had a torrid love affair with the color beige.
3.Don't judge the gorpy smile on my face. Taking a picture of your fetus in a mirror with an iPhone is hard.
4. Check out my rack. Those would be Mr. Val's new BFF's, I like to call them "36" and "D". The mister thinks they are awesome, while I remain terrified of them.

So here's the latest round of pregnancy specs, babyVal is officially 16weeks baked, which in culinary terms means he/she is about 3 minutes away from being a ruined souffle.

Weight Gain/Loss: Interestingly, my actual weight has barely changed, it's just all being carried in my boobs and uterus.

Maternity clothes: I've worn a couple maternity tank tops and let me tell you, they are heaven. I fear my regular clothes are not long for this world.

Stretch Marks: Nope. I got swindled into some $50 cream that supposedly alters the molecular structure of stretch marks in the space time continuum or some bullshit. Whatever. I'll try anything.

Sleep: is my very best friend.

Movement: no, but I hope it starts soon!

Food cravings/aversions: aversions have pretty much stopped. As for cravings, I pretty much just want to eat everything in sight all the time. And tomatoes. I can't get enough tomatoes...I'm such a Dego.

Gender: I'm sticking with girl.

What I miss: I'm not gonna lie. I miss booze something fierce.

Best moment this week: everytime Mr. Val kisses my belly.

Oh and one more thing, I bought a little onesie that says "G is for Guacamole" with a little picture of a smiling avocado dressed as an Aztec. It. Is. Awesome.

And now I want Guacamole. Shit.

XOXO,

P.S. Lauren - I promise I will post some recipes including the Fluff Dip soon. It's a sorority girl staple and, incidentally, non-toxic to dogs.