Some of you know that last July, in the process of moving, someone who surely shall burn in the fiery pits of hell stole my Christmas decorations. I'm not even going to try to analyze the psyche of someone who would steal Christmas ornaments except to say that their Karmic backlash should be swift and forceful. I'm thinking death by fire ants.
But I digress.
So now I have to restock my Christmas decoration arsenal. I had some ornaments that are impossible to replace, but thought I could at least get started with the basics: lights, bows, candy canes & balls (stop laughing pervs). I did not anticipate this to be a Tolkien level task. I figured the basic layers of Christmas tree decorating could be found at Target & Home Depot so I schlepped my poor husband around last night after work to get started. (Me being completely OCD, I need the decorations in advance of the tree to avoid any Charlie Brown Christmas references).
We started at Target, which usually does not disappoint, but it appears they've gone a little off the rails in their quest to be "hip". All I wanted was some bows and red, green & gold balls (again, stop laughing pervs), but they were nowhere to be found. If I wanted a 1970's revival tree with disco balls, hot pink & electric blue I would have been good to go. Apparently, if you're a square like me who just wants a green, red & gold tree, Target has passed you by.
We pressed on to Home Depot, since it defies all logic to shop without buying anything. I had seen an ad with a happy looking family gathered around the friendly Home Depot salesman buying strings of Christmas lights for $1.77. My incredibly patient hubs and I finally tracked down a not so friendly Home Depot salesman and tried our best to recreate the magic of said commercial. That would have been easier had he not laughed when we asked where the $2 lights were with a dismissive, "Those were gone in November." He wandered away muttering about how he hated his job. I hear ya' buddy. I worked retail once.
$18 dollars later, all I have are 600 Christmas lights and memories of the ornaments I use to have. It's a start. I'll find enough ornaments and bows to deck out my tree, even if I have to journey to Walmart.
Scratch that. If it comes down to that I'm switching to Hannukah.
Wow, nice employee. Whenever I go into Home Depot I'm usually very impressed with their customer service. That's pretty bad when you hear him say he hates his job!
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